Cultivating Friendship
“Made for Friendship” — Chapter Five Reflection
As we are making our way through Made for Friendship, Drew Hunter has laid out his argument for why friendship is one of the most important experiences a human can participate in. Friendship is very important, but knowing that does little good if we do not know how to develop good, Godly friendships. In this chapter pastor Hunter gives several practical tools for “ Cultivating Friendship.”
Face Time
Pastor Hunter outlines four ways of “Putting in the Work” toward building good friendships. The first is to “Talk Face to Face,” when Hunter says this he does not mean simply talking to friends but having deep conversations with them. He suggests that to have deep friendships you must have deep conversations. One practical advice he gave is to ask friends about how their spiritual life is going, and how they have been encouraged or maybe convicted by what they have been reading in the Bible lately. This stuck out to me because I feel it can be awkward to have these kinds of conversations with friends, especially as a teenage boy. Most teenagers don’t usually have these conversations but that doesn’t mean it’s any less important. Although it may be hard to have those conversations it still needs to happen. It’s imperative to push past the awkwardness to build good friendships. Fortunately not all of his points are as awkward.
The second point he makes seems easier to me. “Doing Things Side by Side” no matter what it is, it is better to do it with a friend. It is hard to have friends if you never do anything with them. I understand life can get busy, and it is not always easy to make time for friends; however, you do not always have to change your schedule for your friends. You can simply invite them into your everyday life. One example of this in my own life is with my sister. Some of my best memories with her are of going to run errands with her because she does not want to do it by herself. Those moments seem to be insignificant, however, when both of our lives are busy sometimes that's all the time we can spend together. Even the simplest of things can become the fondest memories.
Friendship Through Food
Third, and my personal favorite because it involves food, is “Eating Around the Table.” This one came as somewhat of a surprise but it started to make sense the more I thought about it. I know I enjoy people’s presence a lot more when there's some good food involved. Although my family doesn’t share meals very often anymore when we do it’s always a time of joy and laughter. Jesus also shows us the importance of a shared meal with the institution of the Lord’s Supper. He knows the importance of a shared meal which is why He gave us a meal for remembrance.
Encouraging the Heart
Contrary to “Eating Around the Table” Hunter’s last point is probably the hardest for me and that is “Encouraging from the Heart.” If you have spent any prolonged amount of time with me, then you know that I can be a very sarcastic person. This may not necessarily be a bad thing, but it definitely can be if it takes the place of encouragement. There is no doubt that encouragement is important for friendships. Although it may be awkward at first, it is entirely needed for building a good friendship.
Throughout this book, I have undoubtedly been challenged and encouraged to work on building better friendships with the people in my life. In this chapter specifically, I have been challenged to do better. I am excited to use some of the practical wisdom Pastor Hunter has laid out in this chapter and to continue to go through this great book!
